"Winter Wolf"
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‘Winter Wolf’ was written as my expression of the feelings, emotions and frustrations that I felt after returning home from the Army as a Vietnam veteran. I found it was difficult to understand or accept the feelings of disregard and distain that I felt from civilians, government agencies and even veteran associations. It wasn’t just the lack of understanding and/or compassion, it was also the feeling that we were to be ignored and discarded like a bastard child, an embarrassment to be disowned and forgotten. Publicly and seemingly officially we were the defeated. In the opinion of those at home, for all of our losses and sacrifices we had accomplished nothing.
The fact is that we faced an enemy that vastly out numbered us, had years of experience in a style of warfare new to us and had spent years preparing the battle field to engage us. Yet we never suffered a single major defeat, we succeeded in forcing them to the peace table and did in fact negotiate a peace treaty. It was only after we withdrew our combat forces back to American soil that North Vietnam was able to violate the peace treaty and re-invade South Vietnam while America decided not to respond.
To this day, the majority of Americans still do not grasp nor understand the purpose, meaning or accomplishments of the “Vietnam War”. It isn’t understood or taught in our schools or written in our history books. The fact that the security of the Pacific and our present economic structure was secured in both Vietnam and Korea is ignored. Bill Hull
Winter Wolf
I walk alone in this frozen land
Seeking nourishment to strengthen my tired body,
Companionship to warm my chilled soul
A den to rest my weary spirit
Like a ghost, I wander through this world
Not fully alive, not willing to die
Savagely protecting what little I have
To survive is the only purpose for today
Crying to the moon in my darkness
Calling for an end to my night
Searching with the belief that the spring will come
One day the sun will shine and the snow will melt
Knowing that the FATHER will give me peace
That my hunt will end in the union of the pack
Or in the restful sleep of death
For I am the Winter Wolf
Ref: 'Winter Wolf'
A companion piece to 'Winter Wolf'
He was not the strongest of the pack or the youngest. He was not the best hunter or the bravest fighter. He was just the one chosen to be sacrificed for the welfare of the pack.
Winter can be harsh and for a wolf pack that has grown too large, deadly. Food becomes scarce, yet the pack still has to be fed. When starvation threatens, the pack has to make hard choices. One of them may have to be sacrificed for the survival of the rest.
The pack leader chooses one to be driven from the pack. An older male, who is beginning to grow slow, is selected. It might be his brother, a previous pack leader or even his father. He can no longer share in the kills of the pack. He no longer has the security of the pack or the companionship of the family he has spent his life with.
Never since his birth has he been alone. Never before has he been without the companionship, protection and comfort of his family. Now, without warning or reason he is rejected and exiled by all who he has loved, cared for, protected and supported.
His cries go unanswered in the night. For the first time he experiences loneliness. He becomes the winter wolf.
Surviving the northern winter is not a simple task. He has never hunted alone before. If he does make a kill he will have to fight to keep it. His own family will steal his food if the find him. He becomes a scavenger. Driven by hunger he eats what ever will fill his swollen belly.
Loneliness haunts him as he watches his family from a distance. If he comes to close they will drive him off or kill him. His life mate and his children eat, lounge and play in the distance. They ignore his cries and plead for notice. They go on with their lives as if he never was. He is but a ghost of the past, the living dead.
He becomes thin and his coat becomes sparse and brittle. It no longer keeps him warm. Desperation, loneliness and hunger threaten his sanity. As he weakens he becomes the hunted; he now learns what it feels like to be the prey.
Banished, an outcast from the only life he has ever known he walks across his cold white world. His head down and his tail drooping. There is no one he dares talk to or trust. There is no one he can share his life with, no one who will even notice his death, no one, except the scavengers who will feed on his body.
This is the life of the Winter Wolf
Bill Hull
1985
I M M O R T A L
WE WILL ALWAYS BE REMEMBERED
WHEREVER WE MAY ROAM
OUR PRESENCE WILL BE NOTED
OUR WHEREABOUTS BE KNOWN.
WE WILL NEVER BE ABANDONED
DESERTED OR DISMISSED
WE WILL LIVE FOREVER
OUR NAMES ARE YOUR LIPS.
